“Is it wrong to be sexually attracted to an inanimate object? Of course it is. What’s the matter with you?  Even so, the Bataleon Surfer has to be the best looking snowboard I’ve ever seen.

I’d only briefly tested it once before. In a dome, no less. Needless to say, when we woke up in La Clusaz, to the first proper snowfall of the year, I made a B-line for the Surfer.

It’s sublime. The Muhammad Ali of snowboards – floats, stings, and will completely knock you off your feet. It’s every bit as good as you want it to be, and then some.

When you look down you get a sense of what you’re in for. That bulbous, hull shaped nose looks like some kind of futuristic device for collecting rainwater, while your back-foot sits right at the start of that huge swallowtail.

It’s actually a pretty dab hand on the piste. Anyone who’s ridden triple base before will recognise that really intuitive edge-to-edge motion that gives Bataleon’s boards such a unique feel. It’s also one of the few powder boards to essentially still feature a full-length camber, meaning you can commit to putting it over on edge and trust it will hold on.

“It’s every bit as good as you want it to be, and then some”

Regardless of how well it handles the pistes, you’ll constantly find yourself drawn towards the deep stuff with the Surfer. As soon as that base hits those cold freshies, the board completely transforms. With such an exaggerated shape, you expect to feel every inch of the board through the turn. In actual fact, you don’t feel a thing. It’s so effortless, agile, nimble and an absolute pleasure to ride powder.

Obviously sinking will never be an issue, but by keeping the swallowtail a little stiffer I never felt myself washing out the back of the board either (although I know some people have found that to be the case).

It’s a hell of an experience, but it comes in at a hell of a price tag too. This has the look and feel of a collector’s item. If you’re going off-piste, you’ll be double-checking the snow depth before you do.

Would I demo it again? Every time. Would I drop the big bucks on it? Ah, shit… I just might.”

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