Stay well back boys. This one’s got a look of the deranged about him. At over 10ft tall with a taste for malice and hideous onesies, we believe he’s a danger to other mountain users. Just look at that tiny victim in the bottom left corner running for his life. Run little fella, run!
Officers believe he may be attempting to disguise himself as Super Mario in order to slide through customs unnoticed. Some fear Evil Santa, but it’s Evil Super Mario they should really be looking out for – with his insane ability to punch through boxes and taste for magic mushrooms. However, as of now, he appears to be taking a stand against the sartorial forces by digging his oversized razor blade skis deep into the snow, poised to attack.
Thanks to Nikki Lorimer for alerting our officers to this dangerous criminal, we’ve got the FBI (Fashion Bureau of Investigation) on their way.
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