Everyone who should never dance on a pole, dancing on a pole… in ski boots
It is a truth universally acknowledged that drunk people harbour a delusional self-confidence for possessing talents in unfamiliar activities. There is also only a certain volume of Jagerbombs an individual can drink before indulging in the further delusion that they are the sexiest human in the bar. These two delusions are self-evident in any bar equipped with a dance pole.
One of these installed in your bar is the source of much entertainment (and injury). Tipsy men, old enough to be my father, who have no doubt studied talented pole dancers with much interest over the years, like to try their hand at it.
With a belly-full of false confidence these senior citizens fail to recall the necessary TALENT pole-dancing might require. i.e. balance (something heavily compromised by schnapps drinking) and grip (something ski-outwear is not usually famed for). The results are less than astounding.
Only the other day I saw a 50 something male up there on the pole, giving it his best to ‘you can leave your hat on’ when his new schnapps-assisted confidence suggest he try that sexy upside-down manoeuvre he’d seen performed by scantily clad women in his local Spearmint Rhino.
So with great effort and commitment he swung is rental ski boots wildly upwards in an attempt to grasp the pole. The plastic to metal combo provided little friction to curb the burdening force of gravity and down he slid with speed, straight onto his head. His only saviour was the fact that he did indeed ‘leave his hat on’, or rather, his helmet.