Last week, we dropped this bombshell - the gobsmackingly awful official uniform for staff at Sochi 2014. But then to our horror, we found out that the Russians aren't even the worst offenders - wearing horrendous Olympic uniforms is something of a worldwide tradition.
There's enough incriminating material here to fill a whole season of Fashion Police arrests. USA - you really come out on top here. It's enough to make you not want to compete.
So here we bring you ten terrible examples of Olympic uniforms gone wrong. But do any of them compare to the horror of Sochi 2014's?[part title="Chamonix, 1924: Stars and Stripes
No one is entirely sure who these fellas are, apart from the fact they’re one of the first ever Olympic bobsleigh teams with a truly out-there fashion sense. Clearly the dude on the far right didn’t get the memo: “I said Breton stripes, not sabotage the American flag!" And when did pantaloons go out of fashion - 1601?
St Moritz, 1948: Land Girls
We always knew skiiers were a dodgy bunch, but these post-war uniforms take the biscuit. The US women's ski team look like they were taken straight off the factory floor and onto the slopes. To be fair, this was the first Winter Olympics in 13 years and supplies in outerwear were, well, non-existent - so we need to cut them a bit of slack. All we can say, they must have been bloody freezing.Squaw Valley USA, 1960: Nordic Christmas Choir
This is Australia's first and only Olympic ice hockey team. There's a bit of a Cool Runnings tale here - a country known for surf and sunshine rather than ice rinks - taking on USA and Czechoslovakia. They lost both matches, 18 - 1 against the Czechs and 12 - 1 to USA, placing them ninth of.... nine teams.
Still what they lacked in medals, they clearly made up for in sartorial prowess. Pin-striped suit trousers, patent black shoes (I would not like to walk on snow in those!) and a mustard-coloured sweater with a Peter Pan collar. They look like some sort of Nordic Christmas choir. Poor Australia, they produce talent like Torah and then disastrous outfits like this.
Sapporo, 1972: Bare legs and fur moccasins
Oh Canada, what were you thinking? Their 1972 ski team seems inordinately underdressed. The blokes on the right don't look too crap (but I love the fact that the kid centre clearly didn't realise Vans weren't part of the dress code).
But the girls! Mini skirts and bare legs! They must be freezing their asses off. This isn't a Newcastle night out! Someone obviously felt sorry for them and whacked those hideous Yeti shoes on their feet. And they seem to have recruited Velma from Scooby Doo into their ranks.
Lake Placid, 1980: Cold War Awkwardness
Taken bang in the middle of the Cold War, the two superpowers are clearly trying to outdo each other not only physically, but sartorially. The Russians opted for the classic Anna Karenina, skinned mink look - possibly hoping to put across their imposing grizzly bear-style power but instead looking like a pack of aristocratic tourists. The USA meanwhile have gone with the Brokeback Mountain approach of cowboy hat, denim jeans and shearling jacket. It's a look they loved so much, they carried it into Sarajevo 1984 as well. Oh America...
Albertville France, 1992: Ned Flanders
Has Ned Flanders just dropped onto the scene? Nope, it's just a member of the 1992 USA biathlon team. The resemblance is uncanny. Bushy moustache, multi-coloured lycra get-up (leaving nothing to the imagination)... Come on America, you shouldn't be featured in here so many times.
Salt Lake City 2002: Is this 1990?
What is it about Olympic staff needing to stand-out? Simple black trousers: yes. Colourful zig-zag jackets: no. Just no, no, no. You'd think these jackets had dropped out of the 1990s - we're well into 2002 here. But they're still not as bad as the Sochi 2014 ones....
Vancouver, 2010: The Jokers
Please Norway, spare us. It's just too easy! Harlequin chequered pants. Harlequin! That Italian dude from Lady and the Tramp called, he said they want their tablecloths back.
London, 2012: Posh Twats
Oh god America, could you look any more pretentious? It doesn't take to genius to guess this preppy blight on Western civilisation was designed by Ralph Lauren. These are athletes, not shopping mall poster models. Get some proper kit together - for the sake of your nation's reputation.
London, 2012: The Contender
We should have expected it really. This is the Russian Olympic team's uniform for London 2012 - and it's frankly quite telling. Despite not being a Winter Olympic special, it sure looks like one. Bomber jackets with bizzar-o red vomit pattern combined with slinky white trousers, showcased in a cheesy jumping press release shot. This may well be the winner....