Upcycling. It's all the rage. Think turning wine bottles into mood lighting or a bunch of old shipping containers into a hipster shopping mall. Get it right and you've just proved how on trend AND imaginative you are, whilst giving your living space the personal touch. Get it wrong and people will wonder why your house looks (and smells) like the inside of a bottle bank.
Snowboarders have been upcycling their kit since before it was a word, it was called "making your old board into a bench". These days though, there's a lot stuff folk have thought to do with their knackered gear, and when it comes to benches - well, let's just say some people have way too much time on their hands.
Like all things shred, though, we've stolen a lot of ideas from our surf and skate brethren, and if we're honest, they often do it better. So, from the good, the bad to the downright fugly, here's a selection of upcycled furniture shiz currently vying for attention with the endless "wedding dress inspiration" boards on pinterest...
1. The Ronseal
Take board. Screw to frame. Job done. Even the graphic on this old board (K2 Eldorado, since you asked) wasn't fucking about.
2. The Classic
As seen outside snowboard shops the world over. Add copious amounts of stickers for authenticity - bonus points for now-defunct brands.
3. The Park Board/Bench
Should ideally made out of an old Forum Destroyer and include a plaque in memory of Derrick Higginbotham, 1906-1978
4. The Throne
Similar to the park bench, but a questionable addition to your house owing to it looking like a massive cock and balls.
5. The Sawn-Off
A castrated version of the above, and slightly less phallic for it. Just 'mind the gap' if you sit on this thing naked..
6. The Turner Prize
Comfort is over-rated. These look like they'd be at home on the set of a 70s sci-fi...
7. The Swinger
Not your average rope tow...
8. The Love Ski
Nothing says 'romance' like turning your old decks into a love seat - especially if one of them's called 'The Screamer'.
9. The Hell's Angel
I need your clothes, your boots, and your snowboard trike.
10. The Easy Livin'
It's literally, like, a deck chair. Those bumpers still don't get any cooler though, do they?
11. The Rocker
Grandma loves a bit of banana technology.
12. The Clusterfuck
It's the solution to that common problem: how to squat with your friends without the irritation of seeing their faces?
13. The Stacey Alert
I don't even own a bottle of wine, let alone many bottles of wine that would necessitate an entire rack. What am I gonna do... with a wine rack?
14. The Wine Dart
OK, I might occasionally own three bottles of wine, but I still have no use for this object.
15. The Bar Fly
Sometimes a board looks good enough just to hang on the wall. Got any Kalua?
16. The Impaler
Simply skewer a few boards and - hey presto! - your warehouse space has a new set of bookshelves.
17. The Goofy
We're pretty sure that's not BASI-approved technique.
18. The Invert
What it lacks in sophistication, it makes up for in not having a pair of severed legs attached. Still, this person's definitely missed a trick - surely the point of keeping the bindings on is to hide the wall brackets?
19. The Re-Fresh
This ex-snowboard is enjoying a new life as a bathroom attendant. Aftershave, sir?
20. The Tabletop
If you can put up with the slippery surface, this coffee table's a winner.
21. The Desk Job
For when you need a constant reminder that before you had a mortgage, you used to spend time in the mountains.
22. The Switch-Up
This guy arguably needs to spend less time on converting snowboards and more time on plastering.
23. The Danglies
That's more like it. Mountain cabin meets tin-mine chic.
24. The Secret Spot
This design nicely defeats the purpose of low-profile spotlights. Conspicuous upcycling at its best!
25. The Coat Conversion
Need somewhere to put your hooks? A snowboard will perform the job almost as well as a plank of wood.
26. The Mountain Restaurant
Diner seating with wipe-clean topsheet - ideal!
27. The Avy Barrier
Why go to Wickes for your next fence when you can screw a few boards together?
28. The Retro Deck
This home-made Penny skateboard won't cost a pretty petty. Badoom tish.
29. The Dog's Dinner
Snowboard-cum-canine food station - it's my new pet hate.
30. The Foot Plant
We now begin to stray from the realms of pure snowboard coversions, and into the weird and wonderful world of general 'extreme' upcycling. Here we have a binding masquerading as a hanging basket...
31. The Last Lift
Good to see they've kept the all-important safety bar.
32. The 50 Shades
If you're a young woman and you find yourself lured to a swanky apartment with one of these, get out.
33. The Tree Hugger
We're pretty sure Jamie Anderson will have had a spliff on this one. In fact it might well be her garden...
34. The Bird Cage
That's a lot of metalwork for what is essentially, a shit swing.
35. The Dead End
This thing is just depressing.
36. The Happy Place
Creative kids room feature or nightmarish Donnie Darko scene? You decide.
37. The Llewllyn-Bowen
There's nothing like getting your priorities straight. Never mind carpets, furniture or paint - what this room needs is a gondola! I reckon this pair are Austrian. Yeah, they look Austrian.
Seen any ideas we've missed? Or maybe you've come up with a fresh use for your old kit? Let us know.